Flying Free and Finding My Voice

 

  

 Fly Free

 

I have always been one of those people who is naturally shy.  It may have a little to do with the way we were raised, we were always told that children "are to be seen and not heard".  Growing up in that culture, I've always had trouble expressing what I'm feeling or saying what I wanted to say.  Why would I have anything worth saying?  I always felt that when I finally was able to say something, was anyone really listening? 

 

To add to this, I grew up feeling like I really didn't fit in anywhere, that I was usually the odd one out.  I was the one who got picked last for the team, didn't stand up for myself...I didn't know how, didn't have "permission".  I couldn't really find my place, or my voice. 

 

I attended Columbine High School for one semester before we moved to a wonderful little small Texas town.  When I first got there, the kids in my class thought I was "stuck up", because I didn't talk much.  I didn't know I could, I didn't know I had anything to say.  I was overwhelmed and I was a little sad at the beginning. 

 

I didn't play sports - I am the world's biggest clutz - and I certainly wasn't cheerleader material, although I was friends with our cheerleaders.  During our sophomore year, by some small miracle, our little school got an art program and an art teacher.  I thought, maybe this is "IT", something I can do. And I was one of the first people to sign up for that class.  My teacher really guided me and really believed in me.  She even took a couple of pieces of my work to Ft. Worth for a student show and exhibition...on her own time.  I couldn't believe it, it seemed she "got me" and I felt like I was flying. 

 

I still have a hard time expressing myself through words.  But, I just discovered that I've found my voice and a way to express my emotions and really fly.  It's through my artwork.  Even when I'm not sure exactly what I'm feeling or trying to say, it magically appears in a painting.  That is how this was painting was born.  It's titled "Fly Free".  I found my voice and my wings through art.  And the cool thing is, I think people are listening.

 

Below is a little bit on the process of creating this piece.

Beginning Stages

 

I added white paint to tone down the bright pink.  I also stenciled some words on to the piece and started adding ripped up pieces of paper.  I added more white to tone it down a bit more.

   

 

It's finally beginning to take shape!  I added the wings with molding paste and a stencil.  I painted dark, dark brown between the grooves in the wings and added some white and irridescent pearl paint to the wings - and the tiniest bit of pink, of course!  I also stenciled the little pattern coming off of the wings with some molding paste.

 

Hmmm...this piece still needed something.  I think I mentioned before that I've become quite a scavenger since discovering mixed media.  I found these old chippy paint "posts" at a little antique store here in town.  I white washed them with some white and turquois paint and glued them together with industrial strength glue. Also glued on the embellishment at the top.  Then they were attached to the two pieces of cradle board that make up the wings.

  

I added an old antique door knob that I found at the same little shop and an antique skeleton key to hang from the knob with some old wire.  The words "Fly" "Free" are framed with two old, small antique frames that came from long- gone post office boxes.  I think it's finally finished! 

 

 

This piece measures approximately 12 X 27.  It is finished with an archival matte coat, but it still has a tiny bit of gloss to the finish.  It is available for purchase.  If you have comments or are interested in purchasing, please contact me at:  saltlightwatercolors@yahoo.com.  Thanks for "listening"!